I.

We whispered prayers into the corridors
while I spoke into your ribcage,
telling lies to our skeletons
to help you understand.

you said they loved
watching me wax poetic
while I dripped candlelight into your hands.

we watched the dust motes
cover our skin
while I taught you how to fly.
(you were always too afraid to fall
and too afraid to land).

II.

It wasn't lovesongs we sang;
it was half-forgotten hymns.

we never wanted to believe
but you said ghosts exist
without compassion,
and without sins.

I told the doctor
his medication clipped your wings.

III.

I fed you sweet words
tucked in between
candy-canes
and licorice

While I cried in secret every mo(u)rning
pressing tears beneath
the fragile scales
of angelfish

The doctors said
we needed to prepare.

I told them I was kissing
dandelion flowers;
hoping for a wish.

IV.

we counted every soft bruised bone
with lover's temperaments
as your temperature rose and fell.

The doctors crushed them in their hands
when they spoke of vital signs
and dying blood cells.

I tried to catch your lips
as you faded into autumn deeps.
and you climbed into my soul
with quiet repetitions
of borrowed sonnets and villanelles

V.

we mouthed half-formed truths
as your skin turned into pale porcelain -
feather-soft.

and the nurses said
I stopped your heart from beating
when I breathed paper birds
into your mouth.


I told them all
1000 paper cranes
weren't enough.

The hours are slow in the white corridors
but you are with me when the hands strike fear
and the clock whispers twelve.
You hear my voice echo down the halls
a half-empty ward
a clear glass of psychotropic drops.

You crush my ribs
and rob my lungs of tears.
You kiss my wrists
and strip the bone
The silver constellation of scars,
the scarlet mouth of screams
softened by the gentle murmurs
of bodies creased with love.

You breathe the poetry I cannot speak,
you hold the fragile shape of my skull
like a bruised eggshell
as the nurses hold me down

You feel it in your lungs
when the needle slides through,
and the drop of blood is yours too.

You feel the medicated sleep,
the sweet lull of seduction
as sedation pulls at the hull of my veins.
Long hours spent visiting your daughter
While doctors tell you she's insane.

You lie awake each night as the weeks pass
for me
and I feel it in my chest,
in each breath

The hurt I crease into the faces
of my sweet family.

I ache and I am hollow
but you slide words of love
into the deep of my marrow
I burn,
and you have never failed me.